From Born into God's Kingdom To "Born Again" - Heather's Story

One woman's journey of growing up in the "one, true church," believing in a false doctrine, to being truly saved and born again in Christ.

When I was doing endless research before making the final decision to leave the Laestadian Lutheran Church, I came across Heather's YouTube video about her experience leaving the FALC and I was struck by how similar our experiences were. We both went through the process of having questions, turning to God and the Bible, and our lives being forever changed through what we learned. Now, I have the honor of sharing her story. What a beautiful full-circle moment!

Heather Anderson grew up in the FALC (First Apostolic Lutheran Church), an organization that was a result of a split (heresy) in the 1970s from the Laestadian Lutheran Church. Leading up to the split, the two sides shared the same core beliefs but had differing views of how to manage the youth and other issues that were a part of that time. The FALC believed in having more grace and forgiveness for the youth, while the LLC had more of a law-minded approach and chose to adhere to a list of guidelines to keep the youth in line. A few of these guidelines or rules were no makeup, earrings and no "worldly" music, TV, movies, or dancing.

As a result of this split, in the FALC today, they have more freedom to do as they choose and participate in many of these worldly activities but there is still pressure to live a certain way and not stand out from the crowd. For example, members of the church don't usually wear makeup or get their ears pierced but they are free to listen to music, watch movies, own a TV (some don't feel it is right), most participate in school sports, and go to concerts and plays. Dancing is not socially accepted. The youth are also allowed to have "school friends" but after they attend confirmation camp (in 9th grade), they are usually more discouraged from hanging out with them unless their friends want to attend church or "kyds" (youth functions). Many of these things can vary by family but in general if you want to be a model FALC member you will avoid those things that are considered on the ‘fringe’. The FALC doesn’t have specific stated rules but most of their morals are quite similar to the LLC. If you step outside of the “unspoken” rules, you will most likely feel the social consequences. 

From the time she was born until the age of six, Heather lived in Cokato, Minnesota, her mother's hometown, and then her family moved to the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, where her father had grown up. When she was 20, she married her husband, Lyle, who was also a member of the church at the time. She was a devout follower of the FALC and lived by the church's standards, never questioning her beliefs until the the passing of their 4th child, Ina, when she was somewhere between 25 and 26 years-old. It was in the moments following the loss of her child that Heather began to crave God's presence more deeply and she started to examine her belief in the church's teachings. She knew with strong conviction that the "Aposotolics" were not the only ones saved (what she had believed up to that point), which led her to question the church's teachings and pull away from "the fold." While her husband continued to attend with their kids, she slowly stopped going to church. It wasn't until six months later that her husband also stopped attending and they made the decision to move 1/2 mile away from where they had been living. The slight change of environment and the new project of building a home were a helpful transition to “moving on” in other ways.

Upon leaving all that she had previously known, Heather's whole foundation was ripped out from under her, leaving her lost and without direction. The only thing she had to hang onto was her belief in God and Jesus Christ, which she had never faltered on. Until this point, she had believed that being a member of the FALC and receiving a "blessing" was how you were saved and she struggled with knowing how to have her sins forgiven now that she was no longer a member.

In the FALC and LLC, the "blessing," or what is referred to as "the gospel," is hearing someone say the words, "You can believe all of your sins forgiven in Jesus' name and precious blood." According to the church, receiving this phrase forgives you of your sins and makes you heaven acceptable.

Heather stayed in this limbo of uncertainty, semi-isolation, and confusion for a couple of years, which eventually started to affect their kids due to the lack of community and structure. She would wonder who was going to bring her meals and help her when she had a baby without her old care-taking community. Throughout this time, she dabbled in the New Age and actually quite enjoyed it. It was wonderful to have the freedom to learn how to be friends with anyone, regardless of their beliefs or background. At the same time, God was removing her fear of attending another church and they began to explore other options as a family. She describes her experience of going to a new church as a little foreign and strange because she had been taught how dangerous other "worldly" churches are, but they soon settled on a home church with other believers, who were not members of their old community but made them feel welcome. She had a new baby and as it turned out, plenty of people brought her meals and were incredibly loving and supportive. In life's more stressful and challenging moments, they would have the support which they needed, though, it still took a long time to truly open up to community, vulnerability, and deep relationships. It was weird and challenging in many ways to try to make friends with people who were from different backgrounds, both Christians and those who did not profess Christ. As a family, they were very used to people being so similar in culture and beliefs and keeping all others, who did not believe the same, at an arms distance.

Still the question remained of how to have her sins forgiven. One night, she had an encounter with Jesus that changed her life forever. She fell to her knees in her bedroom, sobbing and crying out to the Lord, seeking His help. In that moment, she was "born again" and knew with certainty that Jesus had died for her sins and that Jesus' last words before he was crucified on the cross were true, "it is finished." She was forgiven because He had died on the cross for our sins and forgiveness was available for all of those who believe in Him. In Heather's words, "we don't need to continue doing XYZ to be saved. Salvation isn't conditioned on XYZ or things we do." She further explained, we are not capable of saving ourselves by continuing to ask others for the forgiveness of our sins or by knowing "who" the "proper" people are to receive this forgiveness from. We only need to believe in Jesus Christ as our savior, have a repentant heart, and turn to him in genuine Faith. He will help us forsake our old sinful ways. After her "come to Jesus" moment, she was changed. God inspired her to stop dabbling in the New Age, which she had been very involved in, and showed her how it was not fulfilling her desire to know God. She came to the realization that it was keeping her in a "victim mindset" where she felt like she needed to be in a constant state of growth - healing, looking for something, working on herself, and doing her own thing instead of turning to God for answers. It was then that she could see that she hadn't known God for who He truly is. In the FALC, she had tried to define God based upon the church's beliefs and after she left and went into the New Age, she had viewed God through her own lens of reality. As Heather stated "It's human nature to want to [have] control." It’s also very painful and hard and humbling to realize you have invested so deeply into a lie. 

We want to be in control of our reality and how we perceive the world around us. We paint a picture of God in our mind and that is who He is to us, whether it is based on Truth or not. It's only when we truly seek Him that we can come to know the loving, forgiving God of the Bible.

After attending the home church they had been a part of for about three months, Heather and her husband decided to check out a couple other local churches and landed on a small, non-denominational church, which they still attend to this day. Heather noted that it took a while for them to feel comfortable in their new community and church. She questioned if that came from what they had been taught in the FALC, that all other churches have "dead faiths." She soon realized it stemmed from how foreign it was to be on the outside and trying to find her way in a new world.

As she explained to me, "a lot of people don't fully believe in the the church and what it teaches; but they are scared to leave because they think they will have no community outside of the church and won't know what is right or what is Truth since they were taught to not think for themselves. Suddenly, you have to think for yourself and figure out what is right without someone telling you. It takes time to unravel the enemies lies, which is where the fear comes from. The Holy Spirit will help you to overcome if you are trusting in and walking with Jesus. It doesn’t happen overnight. You feel very vulnerable because in the past, you had this huge group of people to verify that you are on “the right path”, but now you have only faith the size of a mustard seed, and it’s between you and the Lord. The journey can have some lonely moments at times as you learn to allow God to lead you to the community and fellowship he wants for you. However, Jesus himself is the only rock worth standing on! He is sufficient!

Being a part of a high-control religion can hijack your conscience (in a way), depending on how much you bought into the church's teachings. It is hard to know right from wrong, what is good and what is not. At first, Heather had a difficult time navigating this part of her new belief system and felt a lot of fear around discerning what is truly wrong but one day, God spoke to her, comforting her. God asked if she could trust Him and reassured her that she doesn't have to figure out what she believes about everything immediately, while challenging her to show her faith in Him through simply trusting that He would lead her. He would show her the Truth. She didn't have to do a 180 overnight, there was a lifetime to learn how to walk out her Faith and what that looks like on a practical and day to day level as a mother and wife.

They soon found their way in their new community and she began to notice stark differences between the FALC and other Christian organizations. One experience that stood out to her in particular was when their pastor moved and they weren't sure if the church would be able to stay open because they needed a pastor. It was surprising when pastors from other local churches came to share the gospel and preach! They didn't have to be from a specific denomination because they all believed the same, so they came together to help their fellow brothers and sisters in faith with time, people, and resources. What a beautiful thing to witness - the true love of Christ, through the Christian community coming together to help those in need! These people were not actually of the devil as she had been taught! God's kingdom is spiritual and is comprised of all those who believe in Jesus Christ, it is not limited to a specific organization or church building.

Today, Heather is still attending the same non-denominational church with her husband and children, continuing to grow in her relationship with Jesus Christ and knowledge of God's word. She has been born again and made new, and is now led by the Holy Spirit rather than an organization. What a powerful testimony of faith, perseverance, and hope! Freedom is possible and you do not have to leave God in the process, you are able to have both God and a new life made joyful by Him.

"Behold, I stand at the door and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me."

Revelation 3:30

Thank you for taking the time to read Heather's story. It touched me and I hope it inspires you on your journey as well!